The Almighty Council

The coronavirus assignment seemed to be one of the Almighty’s toughest tests of the Council. The Council of Mythologies was an elite organisation led by the Supreme Power of all mythologies, the Almighty himself. He had personally chosen the members of the Council to help them run the world and spread knowledge across mankind. Every now and then, he gave the Council some assignments, and to review the latest one, the Council had convened again. Despite best efforts by the leaders of several mythologies, Earth had managed to set itself on fire all over. The tension in the Holy Courtroom had left the air hanging. Everyone sat at the high table, with whispers and papers flying across the room. The Roman representative was in a heated discussion with Brahma, still struggling to fend off the weird species that was threatening to kill all their people. Jesus was trying to explain to the Holy Light of Allah what the odd orange man in America was trying to do. All in all, it was simply a ruckus. 

“You guys cannot maintain order anywhere in the universe, can you?” boomed a voice from the chamber of the Almighty, and the Council fell silent. The Almighty continued, “I told you guys to take care of one planet with life. But, I guess the humans are right. Too many cooks spoil the broth. Now, let’s look at this one by one, shall we?”

“But sir, it’s not our fault. Nobody listens to what we say anymore, except for that one man who insists on writing books and is now making a movie, I believe, ” chimed in the Greek. 

“Yes, it’s on Disney+, but the other things on it are pretty fun. But Simba though, that was heartbreaking, ” added Jupiter, the representatives of the Romans. 

“So, you were watching The Lion King, instead of dealing with the coronavirus?” asked the Almighty. Jupiter mumbled something that sounded like the beginning of The Circle of Life but went mum right after.

“Forget that. People are protesting for the death of a black man over in America. Oh my me, do people never really understand that I made different skin colours to deal with the Sun, not with each other. Anyway, how are you dealing with that? Jesus?” 

“Pssst. Pssssssst. Jesus, he’s calling you”, whispered Brahma, the Hindu delegate to the Council. 

Jesus woke up with a jolt, only to be met with several disappointed eyes on him. “Ah yes, sir, I’m here. Sorry, the situation has been a little hectic. I haven’t caught up on my sleep yet. The Orange Man has somehow used the Bible for a photo shoot; I didn’t know that was a thing. As for the racism sir, I don’t know what to tell. I mean, I am a person of colour. I was born in the Middle East, yes Allah, your light is shining bright, and these guys conveniently made me caucasian. You haven’t made it easy for us with the whole coronavirus thing; it is literally the toughest assignment we’ve gotten yet.” An air of sympathy swept across the room for Jesus for his earnest response to a misinterpretation. 

“Okay, so that’s also out of your control. What’s next? Oh damn, this is a fun one, I like this. It’s the International Pride Month, as per the humans, how are we guys celebrating that?” The silence in the room was so deafening; it was the opposite of the Big Bang. 

“Sir, so there’s been a slight confusion there.”, Brahma replied timidly. 

“Confusion? I thought that my new invention in the human brain would’ve worked. Did it malfunction?” the Almighty asked inquisitively. 

“Uh sir, we heard you wrong the last time. We thought you meant that all queerness should be avoided. We just assumed there were some technical difficulties in a few batches here and there since majority rules and all that. Brahma and I did feel it was very uncharacteristic of you, so we made it a little vague, leaving it up to interpretation. I mean you know how much I stand for asexuality! Some of these guys don’t even like that, ” replied, the oddly quiet Buddha, despite the glaring eyes on him. “How did you guys manage to screw up everything, oh my me. Thank me, at least Brahma did something there.” People at the back of the room snickered. “What’s so funny? What happened now?” the Almighty asked impatiently. 

“Sir, it sort of backfired. I don’t even know how that happened. The people think it’s a sin when I have them a million and one citations on how it’s not. I think it’s a formatting error, ” Brahma said meekly.

“This is not a science journal, Brahma. So, what you guys are saying is that nothing any of you have said has actually worked and the humans do what they want to do anyway, but you’re just a crutch for them to blame their misdeeds?” The answer was a resounding yes. Just like that, the Almighty chambers closed again, leaving all the representatives pretty confused on what their next assignment after the difficult coronavirus was going to be. But, for now, the Council was adjourned.